走在風中　今天陽光　突然好溫柔
天的溫柔　地的溫柔　像你抱著我
然后發現　你的改變　孤單的今后
如果冷　該怎么渡過
天邊風光　身邊的我　都不在你眼中
你的眼中　藏著什么　我從來都不懂
沒有關系　你的世界　就讓你擁有
不打擾　是我的溫柔
不知道　不明瞭　不想要　為什么　我的心
明明是想靠近　卻孤單到黎明
不知道　不明瞭　不想要　為什么　我的心
那愛情的綺麗　總是在孤單里
再把我的最好的愛給你
不知不覺　不情不愿　又到巷子口
我沒有哭　也沒有笑　因為這是夢
沒有預兆　沒有理由　你真的有說過
如果有　就讓你自由

不知道　不明瞭　不想要　為什么　我的心
明明是想靠近　卻孤單到黎明
不知道　不明瞭　不想要　為什么　我的心
那愛情的綺麗　總是在孤單里
不知不覺　不情不愿　又到巷子口
我沒有哭　也沒有笑　因為這是夢
沒有預兆　沒有理由　你真的有說過
如果有　就讓你自由
自由　這是我的溫柔
INFATUATION_! :(

I'm HAPPY now even though nobody smsed me today. I guess that's something worth being sad about. Do good friends really keep in contact? Or do distance keep people closer? Now I'm beginning to felt lonelier than ever! :( I saw WeiYing in the MRT today! This was when I realised when friends don't meet, they'll definitely feel that they've drifted apart. Even if the both of us study in the same school, we just happen not to meet each other that often! :( Something that make me feel kind of pity about. Likewise the situation applies to SinRen, who apparently is fighting with the flu bug. ( Bet her boyfriend is fighting it with her too. . . ) And this leaves me alone fighting with loneliness. I don't know, dear girl, i think when you're not smsing me, it's not okay. G_ W _S !

During Chinese lessons, we were discussing about a passage on friendship drifting apart and how people react to casual remarks make about having meals together. Actually, I do find this kind of remarks being hypocrite, just mere lies to conceal the real fact that we cannot make time for each other. It's quite true that many of us still prefer our old friends, in which we consider friends we have built memories or spent time with, yet who ever take the initiative to initiate an outing or a simple lunch out? Often we blame on each other, but failed to think from another perspective. The dilemma we keep inside, hold us back from the real truth. It hinders the outcome, and nobody gains from it. After all, maybe we should just break the cycle the mindset, and start asking our friends out right now!

"Does Anybody Hear Her"

She is running
A hundred miles an hour in the wrong direction
She is trying
But the canyon's ever widening
In the depths of her cold heart
So she sets out on another misadventure just to find
She's another two years older
And she's three more steps behind

Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?
Or does anybody even knows she's going down today
Under the shadow of our steeple
With all the lost and lonely people
Searching for the hope that's tucked away in you and me
Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?

She is yearning
For shelter and affection
That she never found at home
She is searching
For a hero to ride in
To ride in and save the day
And in walks her prince charming
And he knows just what to say
Momentary lapse of reason
And she gives herself away

If judgement looms under every steeple
If lofty glances from lofty people
Can't see past her scarlet letter
And we never even met her

He is running
A hundred miles an hour in the wrong direction
No amount of tears can reverse the pain I feel inside me.
Nothing can seemed to fit right into the place now.
Neither any form of comfort will help to alleviate my pain.
I'm standing still, but with a broken heart.
I'm just one of the left behind by the world.
Did I make a wrong decision? Did I? Did I?
There's so much agony in my life right now, that I do not know how to get rid of it.
People often says or encourage you to stand up or prove to people you can, but unless you're in the shoes of that person, no amount of words can do to uplift the spirit of one's sufferings.
Either I'm in the wrong place, stumbled upon the wrong subjects, ... and everything don't seemed to go in place.
I tried. Maybe not hard enough.
How much can I move on, when there is a knife piercing through my heart?
You've already opened your mouth, spoke, hurt and done.
It's an irreversible process.
Once hurt, it will forever be there.
Yes, we're all tired, sick of life, sick of the trials and tribulation we have to go through.
But have you ever consider how I felt when you said those words.
Your words might work for someone else, but not me.
Now that my world has lost its meaning, what more should I say or even stay?
Everything I do now, my world, has turned into black and white.
Every moment, I just feel like crying.
My life has turned upside down, and I'm just one good-for-nothing, idling around.
I'm neither good in any subjects as far as I can think of, not good in character, a lousy personality, not even tall, not even pretty, ...
And I realized I have problems making friends as I grew older each day.
How should I continue with life, . . .
Each step I took forward every single time I fail, seemed to brought be back a thousand steps.

People never crumble in a day, I guess the day has just come.
Psalm 89:38-45 (New International Version)

38 But you have rejected, you have spurned,
you have been very angry with your anointed one.

39 You have renounced the covenant with your servant
and have defiled his crown in the dust.

40 You have broken through all his walls
and reduced his strongholds to ruins.

41 All who pass by have plundered him;
he has become the scorn of his neighbors.

42 You have exalted the right hand of his foes;
you have made all his enemies rejoice.

43 You have turned back the edge of his sword
and have not supported him in battle.

44 You have put an end to his splendor
and cast his throne to the ground.

45 You have cut short the days of his youth;
you have covered him with a mantle of shame.
Selah

Yet God will forgive. Don't lose your joy in the Lord. Let's live today with authority and security because we are walking with Him. If you find yourself down, look up. Ask Him to raise you up and restore you to victory again.

* * *

Sometimes God's discipline can be hard. Have you lost your joy in life because of His chastening? Regain the reign in your life. Look to God for forgiveness and restoration.